The sound of a crackling fire, laughter in the kitchen, friends and family coming together or a perfectly cooked meal, presents under the tree; these are often the images of the holiday season that you see around you, perfect happiness and joy. This is not always the reality.
The holiday season brings stress and pressure for many people and families. Money, expectations, societal pressure, family dynamics, loneliness, all of these can lead to what I think of a holiday burnout out or as it is actually called Holiday Depression.
I have been there, when I should have been enjoying the pleasures of the holiday season all I could see in front of me was debt, commercialized expectations, uncomfortable family dynamics and a feeling of loss. The feeling of loss was the most confusing aspect of my holiday depression. No one had died, no one was missing but I keenly felt that I had lost something. After extensive soul searching and a little bit of help from google, I realized I was experiencing the loss of the holiday spirit.
When I was young I don’t remember the presents or shopping. I remember the feeling of safety and family. I remember the quiet feeling after it snowed, hunting for a tree in the forest with my family, I remember watching the lights on the trees and how my Mother would always hang her ornaments on the tree last and that would mean the tree was decorated for Christmas. None of these were tangible items bought in a store or ordered online, they were not a perfectly decorated house or a perfectly cooked meal for 20. This was a feeling. This post is for all of you who need to recapture the feeling of the holidays. Here’s how to do it.
Give Back
I don’t mean presents, give the gift of kindness. Giving back to your community is a double win, good for people who experience loneliness or are less fortunate during the holidays and it reminds you to be grateful for what you have.
- Volunteer at your local food bank or shelter– Holidays are hard on many people but can be even worse for the homeless or hungry.
- Visit nursing homes and retirement facilities – Loneliness is an unfortunate part of many elderly lives, give a little joy and comfort this holiday season.
- Start a local food drive– Food drives are easy to start, people often can donate tangible items rather than money during the holiday season.
- Buy local and/or handmade– Buying local and handmade gives your local economy a boost. $68 for every $100 stays in the community when spent at a local business.
- Create care packets for the homeless – This is the one my daughter was passionate about after visiting a large city and experiencing homelessness for the first time.
Homemade Holidays
Homemade is from the heart, it is often cheaper and more appreciated than a store-bought item. Children will cherish the activity of giving something made with their own hands instead of a department store item. Most decorations can be made by hand and will infuse your home with warmth and memories for little to no cost.
- Homemade Gifts -When the thought of holiday shopping causes unhappiness turn to homemade gifts instead. If you can knit or crochet try your hand at making potholders! If fiber crafts are not your thing, try kitchen gifts: jams, jellies, baked goods, fancy mustard, with a piece of fabric for the top of the jar and you have a gourmet gift!
- Handmade Decorations– Decorate your home this holiday season with simple crafts, materials from nature, and thrift store supplies.
- Holiday Meals– Celebrate a holiday meal potluck style! Friends and family will love to show off their favorite dish and share it with loved ones and all the stress won’t be placed on you!
Holiday Spirit
This is the one I struggle with the most. what is the holiday spirit? Black Friday shopping spree to try and get little Susie the perfect gift for the best price? Commercial holiday traditions that create stress and high expectations? These traditions are the things that contribute to my holiday burnout. Instead, consider some alternative ideas that involve the whole family and create a sense of wonder and magic that you have been missing.
- Caroling-It is amazing how much joy the gift of song can bring. Organize a caroling group, you do not need to be an expert singer let your enthusiasm carry you!
- Sledding– Nighttime sledding is my favorite. My Dad used to take us behind our house to sled when the moon was full, these were some of my favorite memories of him.
- Bake cookies for the neighbors– Easy win! working together as a family and making someone feel good!
- Game Night– This is a tradition that needs to be revisited everywhere! Much less stressful than a dinner party, ask your guests to bring their favorite snack to share and then enjoy!
- Decorate for the birds– Help out your woodland friends this holiday season! This one is more of a craft idea but kept my children entertained for hours and it was a genuine pleasure watching the birds. Create safe and fun bird treats and then decorate a tree in your yard for the birds!
Hygge
If your part of the 2% of the population who hasn’t heard of this new buzzword that is used to sell everything from books to candles well then let me explain. Hygge is a Scandinavian word for a mood of coziness and comfortable conviviality with feelings of wellness and contentment. I generally do not like overused, trendy words or practices but Denmark is among the top three happiest countries in the world even when they spend about 6 months in the cold and dark, so maybe they have discovered something that we need in our lives. Hygge is not something you buy, it is something that you nurture and create. These following suggestions are easy and free ideas that anyone can incorporate into their lives.
- Create coziness– Candles, throws and soft music. Create a home that is welcoming and comfortable to be in. Bring the outside in, decorate with natural materials to make your space special.
- Unplug– Turn off the t.v., put away your phone, computer or tablet and drink a glass of wine, tea or coffee and have a conversation. Just talk to your children, partner or friends. Easy right?
- Go outside– Being outdoors is shown to reduce stress in a little as 10 minutes a day. Too cold? There is no bad weather just bad clothing. Purchase the best outdoor clothing that you can afford. If you are short of funds try your local thrift shop or many large name outdoor clothing stores have websites for gently used outdoor clothing.
- Socialize– Say yes to that cup of coffee with friends, say yes to the new parent playdate. Laundry can wait, pay the bills tomorrow, a good conversation is never regrettable.
- Cook dinner together– A hearth or kitchen is often the center of a home. Instead of eating because food is required to live, try cooking together with family or friends for the joy. Don’t eat in front of the T.V. eat at a table together and talk about your day.
